The Answer

I went to church on Saturday and had an unexpected conversation. A man who I had seen the week before had come again. He was easily recognizable. He had a foreign accent and if you met him, you'd instantly know where he was from. Very obviously, he was disabled, but he was able to get around.

Talking to this man, I heard his gentle voice describe how he knew Jesus as his Savior, and that an accident and a doctor's mistakes gave him his handicaps.  The accident had actually killed him, and he had seen the gates of Heaven, but Jesus told him that he needed to come back to Earth.

"There must be some reason why I'm still here," he explained.  "It was so beautiful in Heaven, and I know there was no sorrow there, and life is so difficult now."

The doctor who tried to fix him made mistakes and left him crippled.  His father was his physical therapist, pushing him beyond his limits to become mobile again.

And then I realized I knew the answer to his unanswered question.

"I know why you had to come back to life," I replied.  "You see it's not enough that you just make it to heaven.  God wants us to enjoy Heaven to our fullest potential."  I had a hard time keeping back the tears.  "The Bible says that where our heart is, there our treasure is too.  Every bit of suffering we face here as Christians builds our treasure in Heaven."

"No one has ever explained it to me like that," he said. 

[Our fathers] disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. "Make level paths for your feet," so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed.  (Heb 12:10-13 NIV)

Isn't that amazing!?  That's not the only place in scripture that tells us how this works:

Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies.... And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. (Rom 8:23, 28 NIV)

The answer is right there, but it's hard to realize it when you're in the midst of suffering.  You can't seem to understand why you are in the situation you're in, and it feels as if it will last forever and that you can't get out of it, that you're powerless to work through the situation.

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2Co 12:9-10 NIV)

Remember in Luke when Jesus quoted Isaiah in the synagogue (Luke 4:16-21)?  He read this:

The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me, because the LORD has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the LORD's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion—to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor. (Isa 61:1-3 NIV)

The sorrow and hardship we face here on Earth is temporary.  It may be a difficult road, but our reward will be beyond what we can imagine.  I'm not exaggerating!  It's easy to say that it's beyond what we imagine, but what God wants to give us in His Kingdom is too wonderful for words.  That's why Paul wrote this:

And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus, in order that in the coming ages he might show the incomparable riches of his grace, expressed in his kindness to us in Christ Jesus. (Eph 2:6-7 NIV)

Could you imagine being a billionaire?  God's riches in Heaven for us who have accepted Jesus will be greater than that if we remain faithful to Him in adversity.

Let's pray that we would be able to endure hardship joyfully, whatever it may be, that we would be worthy of the great wealth God wants to bestow on us.  Myself, I have a difficult time with that joyfully part, but with prayer and faith, God will give us that joy and faithfulness.

Given Life

I recently moved to the Seattle area, so I also started going to a new church.  It has services on Saturday and Sunday.  Today there were three baptisms and one of the women who was baptized was a student at Seattle Pacific University (SPU).

As you might already know, SPU is reeling from the violence that occurred a couple days ago when a gunman killed one man and injured two others.  He was stopped from hurting more by a brave young man with mace who was engaged to be married.

This particular baptism was poignant because she had recently become saved, and her mother had traveled overseas for this special occasion.  Then, out of nowhere, this madness at SPU happened.  She was in the same building where the the accused gunman, Aaron Ybarra, was.  The young lady said hi to one of her friends moments before the gunman started shooting.  That woman she said hi to was apparently one of the victims.

She almost refused to be baptized today under the circumstances.  Her mother had come a long distance, but now her mother was there to comfort her.  With great fortitude, the young lady went under the water with the pastor's care.  It was an act that symbolized her death to her sinful life before she was saved, and rising up out of the water a new creation in Christ.  Today though, it was an act that also symbolized how God had preserved her life in the chaos two days ago; she could have died, but God gave her life.

After the church service, I congratulated her on her baptism.  At the time, she was taking photos with friends and family in the lobby of the church.  On her left arm was writing memorializing the victims of the SPU shooting.  When she was available, I told her how I thought she was so brave to be baptized today.  Even though there didn't seem to be any sense to the tragedy, one day God would show her his grace through it all.

The suspected perpetrator of the crimes came to a Christian university to unleash his rage.  He meant to harm as many people as he could, and for some reason, targeted a religious academic institution.  Yet, God is making something beautiful out of the lives shattered by this incident.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose (Rom. 8:28 NIV).

Giving Thanks For Everything

Always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
(Eph 5:20 NIV)

Of all the things that are difficult to give up in this Christian life, I find that complaining is one of my most difficult vices.

We tend to look at various issues in our life as being good or bad, white or black, and often miss God's blessings in what seems to be a curse.  I think many of us have read that story where the person asks God why they had a bad day and God responds by saying that he basically saved their life and things could have been a lot worse.

Although I think this idea has good sentiments, I don't think it covers what I'm referring to very well.  First of all—what happens if it's worst-case scenarios that really happen, like losing a limb, losing a loved one, becoming homeless, having a divorce, becoming bankrupt, or something else?

For this blog post, I'm assuming that there is no wrong-doing on the part of the believer.  I also am not going to differentiate between persecution for Christianity and the suffering that comes with life.  Although there are different causes, I think they should be handled the same way. 

There are blessings even in the worst of circumstances.

It's so easy to get in a funk over bad circumstances.  One of my heroes, Corrie Ten Boom, once wrote how Betsie taught her that we should give thanks to God for everything—even the fleas.  It's kind of a long excerpt, so if you'd like, you can read it here.

The gist of the story was that while Corrie and her sister Betsie were in a Nazi concentration camp, they were transferred from one barrack to the other.  They had hoped that the second barrack would have better conditions than the first, but their hope was vain.  Instead, the barrack was flea-infested.  Betsie told Corrie that their solution was to give thanks to God, even for the fleas, but Corrie couldn't see why.  Weeks later, they found out that the reason the guards wouldn't come inside the barrack and why they had relative freedom to talk and share the Bible was because of the fleas.

There is a blessing hidden in even the worst of circumstances.  As hard as it may be to see it, that's what Betsie saw.

How the people of the Bible endured hardship

I am amazed at some of the things that I have read in the Bible.  Paul carried on about his persecution and then said, "If I must boast, I will boast of the things that show my weakness" (2 Cor. 11:30 NIV).  In Acts 16, he and his companion Silas were beaten and thrown in prison, and their response to this was to sing hymns in the middle of the night.  The author of Hebrews wrote, 

Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you endured in a great conflict full of suffering.  Sometimes you were publicly exposed to insult and persecution; at other times you stood side by side with those who were so treated.  You suffered along with those in prison and joyfully accepted the confiscation of your property, because you knew that you yourselves had better and lasting possessions.  So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.  (Heb. 10:32-35)

In their perseverance through troubling times, these people had joy!  They weren't recorded as being complainers or whiners.  Instead it seems that God commended them for their joyful acceptance of these things.

It just doesn't make any sense.  Why would you praise God for getting the flu?  Why would you thank God that your child got a broken arm?  What is the good in the fact that your house has been infested with termites?

Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say it again: Rejoice!  Let your gentleness be evident to all.  The Lord is near.  Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Phi. 4:4-7)

God, through his Word, has promised that his peace will guard our hearts when we do these things.

Putting It into Practice  

I cannot admit that this is very easy to put into practice.  When everything in the world seems to be going against you, how do you do this?  Just take the first steps.  Find some things that are easier to thank God for and start there.  Eventually, it becomes easier to thank God for things that are pretty miserable.

I remember that this entire concept really hit me around Thanksgiving time.  Then in December, I got a really bad flu.  I was sick for four days with a temperature between 102-103.4°F.  It wasn't easy to thank God for the flu.  More things have happened in my life in the recent past and they are pretty hard to swallow.  I mean—can I really expect others to do what I say if I cannot do it myself?  Admittedly, this is a work in progress, but nonetheless, I haven't stopped trying.

God's transcendent peace is kind of a difficult idea to follow.  Having grown up in Charismatic and Pentecostal churches, it's often associated to a feeling.  God's peace is greater than just a feeling though.  God's peace can be there even if you don't feel it.

Could you imagine being at the first Passover in Egypt long ago?  Your family and friends have gathered into one house and everyone's eating a special feast.  You've painted blood—real blood—on your doorway and you can hear the cries of those who are losing their firstborn children.

God was meeting out judgment upon all Egypt and provided protection, peace if you will, for the Israelites.  No doubt many of them were worried and anxious about the night.  At the same time, they knew that God would protect them because they did what he told them to do.  The Passover represented Christ's death on the Cross nearly 1,500 years later, when God made peace with humanity.

Our peace isn't merely redemptive in nature, it's protective.  There's a reason that the Bible says that we should be bold and strong since God is for us.  Since God is for us, no one can be against us, for he holds eternity in his hand.  The Bible also states that our weapons and warfare are not physical, but spiritual.  God is bigger than all those awful things that happen to us in life.

So, I would posit that being able to thank God for all things is the true fruit of trusting in our God.  God's peace isn't necessarily something we can feel, but a state of fact that either we believe or doubt.  We should pray for those things that we're genuinely concerned about, but we must find a way to allow God to be sovereign in our hopes, dreams, catastrophes, and failures.

I am learning to trust God no matter what.

'Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,
and to take him at his word;
just to rest upon his promise,
and to know, "Thus saith the Lord." 

Refrain:
Jesus, Jesus, how I trust him!
How I've proved him o'er and o'er!
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
O for grace to trust him more!

O how sweet to trust in Jesus,
just to trust his cleansing blood;
and in simple faith to plunge me
neath the healing, cleansing flood!
(Refrain)

Yes, 'tis sweet to trust in Jesus,
just from sin and self to cease;
just from Jesus simply taking
life and rest, and joy and peace.
(Refrain)

I'm so glad I learned to trust thee,
precious Jesus, Savior, friend;
and I know that thou art with me,
wilt be with me to the end.
(Refrain)

—Louisa M. R. Stead (c. 1850-1917)

A Glimmer of Hope

"And provide for those who grieve in Zion—to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor." (Isa 61:3 NIV)

As Christians, we can retain the hope that even as we feel despairing, sad, and dirty, these things are only temporary.  Jer. 29:11 tells us that even in the midst of being exiled, God has good plans for us, and Rom. 8:28 says that things will work out if we love Him.  Paul goes on to write that even in the greatest hardship, we are more than conquerors.

Where we see despair, hopelessness, and loss, God sees joy, righteousness, and fruitfulness.

Sometimes it's hard to look at our situations the way God does.  It takes real effort to grab on to the promise of hope when everything is the opposite.

The Syrian army had surrounded Elisha's city.  His servant was fearful asked Elisha what they should do.  Elisha calmly told his servant that there were more with them than in the Syrian army surrounding the city.  It didn't make any sense to the servant, and so Elisha prayed that God would open his eyes.  What the servant saw was a vast angelic army riding flaming chariots (See 2 Kings 6:15-17).

You can ask God to make your faith stronger, to help you hold on to his promise that he will take care of you.  He'll bring help to you if you'd just let him.

How to Die to Yourself as a Single Christian

In the previous post, I explained the meaning of John 12:24, and ultimately, how it applies to single Christians.  God wants us to produce good fruit, and that means that we ought to become more Christ-like, but it also means that we should make more Christians.  As single adults, our mandate is to die to ourselves so that we can produce that fruit.

The Solution

The big question is, "How do we die to ourselves?"  Often thoughts of constant prayer, Bible reading, going to church pop in our heads.  (By the way, if those are things that you don't like to do, then you should re-examine your relationship with Jesus; if you love him, those things will not be a drag.)  As well, we think of ways that we can avoid temptation and sin, assuming that taking up our cross requires piety.  Also, we think of ways that we can become more full of faith, hope, and love—the three most important Christian virtues that exemplify Christian growth.

Dying to ourselves is answered much more simply than attempting to apply a self-help book to our lives.

Jesus called them together and said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them.  Not so with you.  Instead whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." (Mat. 20:25-28 NIV)

Becoming servants to all is an extension of dying to ourselves.  We don't want to serve other people, but we want to be served.  To produce Godly fruit, we must become servants to all.

Servitude combats selfishness.  If we can serve others, we'll be able to serve our future spouse and children well.  We have to build and grow our own character before we can shape the character of others.  If we want to become leaders, we must become servants first.  If we involve ourselves in public ministry without a servant's heart, we destroy ourselves and those souls we would rather see in Heaven.

The Reward of Servitude

We often neglect the actual outcome of servitude in our lives.  Do you remember the story Jesus told about the sheep and the goats?

"Then the King will say to those on his right, 'Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.'

"Then the righteous will answer him, 'Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?'

"The King will reply, 'Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.'" (Mat 25:34-40 NIV)

We have eternal rewards for public service.  Since we don't see those rewards in our lives right now, we easily ignore the fact that they are being stored up for us in Heaven.  Every time you give a glass of water to a child, it is the same as giving it to Jesus Christ himself.  Could you imagine that instead of giving clothes to a homeless person, you're actually giving them to Jesus?

What can I do?

Firstly, we should remember to take care of our own families before we try to make the world a better place (1Ti. 3:4-5).  If you have a grandmother in an assisted living facility, go visit her on a regular basis (1Ti. 5:4).  Is your brother in jail for drug possession?  If he'll accept your visits, go see him!  Is a nearby cousin without a father or a mother?  Why don't you go take her to the park and spend time with her? 

There are many kinds of community service that we can provide outside of family situations.  Here are just three right off the top of my head:

• Volunteering at animal shelters
• Spending time with residents at nursing homes
• Prison ministry

About nine years ago, I believe God directed me to take care of my grandmother.  I came to live with her for six years, and helped her take care of her sister who had Alzheimer's Disease.  I provided transportation, company, upkeep for our huge yard during the summer, I often cooked for her, I helped take care of her bills, and attempted to control her hoarding as best I could so that we could both live in the same place.  I was there for her when she had a stroke, and I visited her in a nursing home for almost three years.  She passed away this January, and so that chapter of my life is finished.  I'm now looking for the next opportunity God creates.

So, consider what you can do to benefit your family or community.  Read  James 1:27.

A Single Seed

 

Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. (John 12:24 NIV)

 

That quote by Jesus was made during the last week before his crucifixion in Jerusalem.  When some Greeks requested to see Jesus, He responded by predicting his death and resurrection using a parable-like axiom.  Next, Jesus used it to explain how we ought to live our lives.  As single adults, we can be certain that this axiom has special meaning for us as well.

Jesus' Death and Resurrection

It's because Jesus died and rose again that we can have new life and fellowship with God.  John 1:1-2 states that He existed from the beginning, and that he was with God.  Jesus fell to the ground when he came down to Earth (John 1:14).  He died (John 19:30), and after his resurrection, he built the Church (Luke 24:46-49, Acts 2).

The Church at Large

In John 12:25 Jesus said, "Anyone who loves their life will lose it, while anyone who hates their life in this world will keep it for eternal life" (NIV).  Although he was speaking about his own death in the previous verse, he was also explaining that his statement about a kernel of wheat also applies to us as well.

As believers, we must daily die to ourselves.  Jesus commanded us to tell the whole world about his free offering of eternal life and forgiveness of sins, but only when we die to ourselves will we be able to produce more believers in Jesus as the Christ.

God loves all of us and will never leave or forsake us, but in order for us to die to ourselves, we must "fall to the ground."  We are those kernels of wheat in the Master's hand.  He does not let go of us to abandon us, but to allow us to grow.  In our most difficult times we often think that God ignores us or doesn't answer our prayers, but it's in this way that he makes us die to ourselves.

Single Seeds

Of course, our primary goal as Christian singles is to produce good fruit.  It means that we should become more Christ-like, but it also means that we should produce more believers and build a community of believers.

Many of us singles hope that one day we can build our own families, and that is no less spiritual of a goal as conventional evangelization.  With a Godly spouse, we would be able to produce Godly offspring who can learn about our Heavenly Father and his Son.

As believing singles, our goal shouldn't be to find a spouse, but to die to ourselves.  No, this isn't something easy to put into practice, and when we're dying to ourselves, it doesn't feel very good.  However, in the long run, we will have a more fulfilling relationship with our future spouse and children.

"But how do I find the one that God has made for me unless I look for her?"  You must die to yourself.

Look around you!  How many broken relationships and families do you see around you!?  They're everywhere, even in the Church!  Do you think that these broken families were caused by faith or by sin?  If you really want to have a fulfilling, Godly relationship, you must wait until God gives it to you.

But Until Then...

Jesus gave a simple "formula" for growth using his own death and resurrection as an example.  We use it corporately and individually for evangelization, but as individuals, we must learn to die to ourselves to become more Christ-like and receive those fulfilling relationships for which we long.  It's not an easy path, but we choose to take it because we want to please God.

Misguided Advice for Singles

 At 33 years old, I am a single virgin who hasn't dated in about 6 years.  I know what you're thinking—"I've seen this movie before!"  I promise that I don't have an extensive action figure collection, just four cats.

I look around at my friends and family across the world, and feel the pressure of singleness.  Admittedly, I can feel lonely.  Both my brothers are married, and they're younger than me; one of them already has a baby.  Who knows how long I'll actually live since we're never guaranteed tomorrow?  I don't have any kids, but even though I don't have a "biological clock" so to speak, as time passes, chances of having kids diminishes as I continue to be single.

A lot of well-meaning, but misguided, people try to give me advice.  No one has any new original ideas, they just think that I have to do something about my singleness.  I've never had anyone say to me, "I know this girl you would probably like.  You should meet her."  You see, they don't really have any answers.

I'm sure I don't have to explain that just about every single person has heard these next four lines, and it's probably a good idea to avoid these arguments when you're giving advice.

Your standards are too high.  You need to lower the bar.

Wow, right?  As a Christian, I believe it's imperative to keep those standards high.  One of the main qualifications I have for my future spouse is that she's a Christian and believes in God in a similar way to me (2Co. 6:14).

In my town, I've decided that I will not date GGG (Gross Gardiner Girls).  Since there's not a lot to do in town, most of the single people go to the bars for fun.  Among single people, alcoholism, drug addiction, gambling, and sleeping around are very apparent problems.

During the summer we have some very pretty girls from other countries come to work in or near Yellowstone Park.  Their motives are questionable at best.  Many of these women come from depressed countries, and are trying to get out of their situations.  Guys look like green cards to many of them.  In the end, some of these poor girls end up hooking up with foolish guys who are just looking for a pretty girl to sleep with.  Then the drama starts.

I think my standards are just fine.

You need to move away from where you live.

Obviously if you can't find what you need where you are, you need to go somewhere else, right?

Last year, since I saw that my work opportunities in this town were running out, I wanted to move to Bozeman, about 70-75 miles away.  There are lots of single girls there, and a lot of Christian people with whom I could become friends.

I wasn't able to move because I didn't find a good job in six months.  In the meantime, my housing in the Bozeman area screwed up so I ended up having to stay in Gardiner anyway.

To be honest, I didn't anticipate that I would be in Gardiner this long.  On a few occasions I've attempted to move with no results.  Although my housing even here is tenuous, I've come to accept that God has placed me here, and that I can only live one day at a time, that as much as we make plans, God is the one who orders our steps (Pro. 16:9).

At my church in Bozeman, I haven't met any girls I want to date.  Most of them are already in relationships or are too young as well.  Maybe I should church hop a bit, but that kind of defeats the mindset that:

God still wants me to stay in Gardiner, and I accept that, even though it's not easy.

You should try online dating.

One of my high school friends expressed it best when he opined sarcastically that ChristianMingle tells you that God has hidden a mate for you on their site, and if you subscribe you'll meet them.

I will not settle with humanity's best efforts; I strive to obtain God's favor and His best gifts.  When Adam was in the Garden of Eden, He said that it wasn't good for Adam to be alone and that He would make a suitable helper for him (Gen. 2:18).  Abraham's servant asked God to help him find a wife for Isaac, and before he finished praying, God answered (Gen 24:12-15).

"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. "Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!
(Mat 7:7-11 NIV)

You shouldn't place your faith in God.

When you've shot down everyone's best advice, their solution is that it's God's fault that you're single.  I should reiterate that just like Mat. 7:7-11 says, God cares for us very dearly and he wants us to enjoy good gifts.  As singles, we cannot jump the gun because we've become impatient waiting for God's perfect timing.

However, those who say that my Christianity is getting in the way of what I want, are completely correct.  I love my Jesus so much that I will "Trust in the LORD with all [my] heart and lean not on [my] own understanding; in all [my] ways [I will] submit to him, and he will make [my] paths straight" (Pro. 3:5-6 NIV).

Make the most of your circumstances.

This is the best advice anyone can give to us as singles.  While I'm here, I've started a hiking tour business.  I regularly hike in Montana and Yellowstone Park.  I use my spare time to work on various hobbies.  So many people wish they had as much "spare time" as I have.  Until God puts me in a place where I can meet other women, I'm going to wait as patiently as I can.